Placenta Increta: 27 weeks

I sit here on the weekend, pre-writing for the week to come. My amazing husband just found me an ancient mac lapbook. Cheap, slow, and perfect. Why did he buy me said gift? Well partly because he felt guilty and as a consolation prize to being alone for two weeks (he was in Chilliwack on course the last two weeks) and partly for my impending hospital stay. I told him I need a laptop during my stay at the hospital else I might go insane from boredom! At least if I am admitted early at all. $300 later and we are official macBook owners.

This past week has been a GONG show! With no husband around, every little thing seems that much more difficult. I sometimes lull myself into the false belief that I do most of the parenting around here, housework, cooking. And yet when Jonathan goes away that belief is smashed with harsh reality. Even on days he is working, having my best friend and team-mate here makes my life infinitely easier. An hour here he takes the kids outside, or plays with them, or turns on a show, or makes a meal, etc. etc. Being completely alone SUCKS. No help, no breaks, no one to talk to at night. BLAH. I'm a big believer in no more courses ;)

I had a doctors appointment last week with a new OB in Kamloops. Just IN CASE I don't make it to Vancouver. Of course, there wasn't really anything new. We went over my most recent bloodwork and discovered I am highly anemic, yay. Might explain the whole "vampire" look I've been carrying around lately. So I am on a new regimen on iron pills, 3 times a day, trying to boost my hemoglobin and pheratin levels before the surgery. We also found out that my blood pressure is starting to rise. At this appointment it was 118/82 which compared with my normal of 90-100/50-60 is quite high. Of course, nothing to do about it now but wait and see what happens. But we are starting to mentally prepare for the worst that pre-eclampsia might be in the cards for me again this pregnancy. We are really looking forward to this appointment on Oct. 21st in Vancouver again. It should give us a clear indication if the increta has worsened, if I am indeed getting pre-eclampsia and what that means for us. Last time they tried to put me on bed rest, this time I think I would laugh. You want me on bed rest, you're going to have to admit me people... I have 4 kids! Plus, I actually don't believe in it. We tried last time and it did nothing. I find that being up and about actually lowers my pressures so I think I might just smile and nod and do what I have to do to get through these next few months. Already less than 2 months until this little one makes her first appearance. Possibly sooner now. It seems crazy, and I have so much to prepare in the meantime.

The only bit of good news that we received at this appointment was that if I am released and baby is stable, just "cooking" in the NICU, we could transfer her up to Kamloops. This is such a relief to me, just being closer. Jonathan could stay home with the kids like last time and I could stay in a hotel and go see her all day long, but we are at least a little closer to home base. The whole parking/driving situation in Vancouver is daunting, especially after our near tow.

Anyways, I am off to do my school reporting for the week. Hope everyone has a good week and keep checking back for more "boring medical details" about my parasite placenta as it eats away my organs ;)

25 weeks Increta

So as most of you are aware, I had an appointment down in Vancouver last week. The news was not really news. They were checking to see if the notching had disappeared, which it has not. This means that I am at a high risk of pre-ecmlampsia and IUGR (intrauterine Growth Restriction) and baby will need an U/S every 3-4 weeks to check growth as well as regular BP checks for myself. Nothing really new there. The increta is definitely still there and I don't know if it has gotten worse or not, but this time the tech was a lot more forthcoming with us about the situation. My placenta has grown into my uterine wall so far that only 3 mm remains. I am not sure if they are comparing these measurements each time, but I will be keeping track myself and asking how much remains so that I can gauge how quickly it is growing through. The doctor is not overly concerned about it attaching to my bowels even if it does grow through because your bowels are always moving and it is harder for the placenta to attach to them. This doesn't give me the greatest confidence, simply because what "shouldn't" go wrong, with me means "will" go wrong. But I am praying and hoping for the best. My BP has been higher, they are not concerned, again nothing new. However my lower (diastolic) is usually around 50 and is consistently up at 70 so I am starting to get suspicious that we might get pre-eclampsia as well.

So, where we are at is: C-section has been booked for December 2nd along with a scheduled hysterectomy. They will evaluate if there is any chance of saving my uterus during the surgery based on how much blood I am losing and if the placenta will detach, but she said it is a 95% chance based on what they are seeing that this will not happen. I signed the consent forms already at my appointment (AHHHH!). If there are any other complications (IUGR, pre-eclampsia, placenta growing through, etc) we will bump up the surgery by a few weeks, putting me in the middle of November. I am mentally preparing for this eventuality, which gives me just under 2 months until we meet this little girl. I will be admitted a few days before the surgery for steroid shots for the little one, to have surgery where they insert balloons into my uterine arteries and insert an arterial line to monitor my BP and take blood. If I have preeclampsia my admission date will be bumped up as well for observation.

Where we are at with all of this:

The night before we were supposed to leave, we were spending the night at Matthew and Sonia's so that they could watch our kids first thing in the morning. The kids got sick. The flu. It was so bad. We took Selah and Aliyah with us trying to alleviate the sick ones but both the boys got it as well. We felt so bad. I got it on the way, it was horrible. I felt so sick the whole way, was exhausted and nauseous and achy and weak and trying to just make it through the stupid appointments. We came back to the van after our appointment downtown to see the van being towed away! Jonathan stopped him just as he was pulling away and $90 later we were able to leave. So much for saving money on a hotel, we just paid them all in parking fees instead! It was a disappointing, overwhelming, frustrating day. We felt so bad for exposing Matthew and Sonia to the stomach flu of all things, and it is a long-drawn out sickness to boot. We are still recovering, and Aliyah just got it yesterday.

It seems to be the same as last time with my emotional capacity to deal with this. I come home in a funk. Last time I was able to get myself out of it and was starting to think that maybe I could save my uterus and now that all hope is coming crashing down... the funk remains. I don't want to talk on the phone, I really really don't want to see anyone, I have no motivation to do school, and feel like if it weren't for the kids needing me, I'd be locking myself in my room all day long. We have bloodwork and a follow up in Kamloops next week and then in a few weeks after that, we're back in Vancouver. The road has been set, now we just see how bad it gets along the way. Your prayers are much appreciated, but your phone calls may be declined for the next little while as I adjust to our new reality and settle in. Thanks everyone!

Diagnosed with Increta: 22 weeks

Well this week was full of the remainder of our vacation, getting home and settling back in, getting ready for school, etc. We have done a LOT of talking, a lot of praying, a lot of research, and getting familiar with what we will be doing the most of.... waiting. We will hopefully be getting referred to an OB here in Kamloops to monitor our care in between by appointments in Vancouver. We are starting to make our lists of questions for next time and considering asking for a referral up despite how much I liked our OB in Vancouver. At this point its just a lot of questions and not much we can do about it. We got a call with our appointment times on September 19th which we will be looking forward to if for no other reason than to start working through the whirlwhind of questions in our minds. I am sincerely hoping Jonathan can either be in that appointment or else at the very least drop me off and be on speakerphone back in the hotel with the kids. Not sure what we'll do or how we'll arrange it but at this point it is just infomation overload and I can't even think what to say or ask or how to respond when I'm in the hot seat.

I am tired. Bone weary. Probably a combination of this being my fifth baby and the emotional upheaval of it all. I can't seem to sleep enough. My blood pressure is EVERYWHERE. I feel nauseous, I'm blacking out and dizzy every couple of steps, out of breath. As soon as I am up my BP is 130/80 and then when I am resting it is crashing to 80/40. It makes me feel like crap. In my first trimester I found out I am quite low on iron so it is yet another thing I will have to bring up at my next appointment. In the meantime I am beefing up my iron supplements and just trying to move slowly so I don't fall over. I am supposed to start school this week with the kids, I have a few other things planned in as well as their booster shots, and some sewing projects to complete. It makes me want to cry. I don't want to go anywhere or do anything. Other than school that is. I might be able to manage that, but anything over and above is just simply too much. My home is my sanctuary. My kids are my distraction. I have everything I need here and I just don't want to leave. Growing up with me you would have never guessed I would be such an introvert and homebody, but alas my love and need for people just disappeared somewhere along the way. My life takes up all of my emotional and physical energy, it isn't that I don't miss those "girls nights out" its more that I just don't have the time or energy for them anymore. I would rather spend my few spare moments reading a book, or taking a bath, or heck... GOING TO BED EARLY! ;) One day.

Anyways, baby is healthy for another week. Another week closer to being viable out in this harsh world. In the meantime, I have a house that needs to be cleaned, but I might just call it and go to bed instead ;) Happy first week of school everyone!

Diagnosed with Increta: 21 weeks

21 weeks pregnant

I am currently pregnant with my fifth baby. Thats right folks, number 5! I am young, but would like to clarify that NO, I was not a teen mom. I have had my kids pretty much one on top of another. In fact, in the nearly 7 years of Jonathan and my marriage, I have been pregnant for 41 months. He has known me officially more pregnant and breastfeeding than not. So hey, I must not be a complete crazy person when I'm pregnant ;) Our beautiful kids are 6, 5, 4 (in a few months) and 1 1/2. We are thrilled that our littlest one is  going to have a little buddy to play with and found out that she will in fact have a sister to keep her company. We wanted a baseball team ;) Well, not necessarily. But we wanted to keep on having kids. Our plan in life was to trust God for the spacing and timing of our children and to keep on having them until we got to the point where we could not or were not coping with it. We both feel as though this is our greatest calling in life and each new baby has brought so much joy for both Jonathan and I, I guess you could say we are a bit addicted.

How could we NOT be addicted, look at these little monkeys! 

But alas, my addiction to babies is being called into an intervention of sorts. With my last two pregnancies I had problems with retained placenta after the birth and difficulty removing it. So this time we decided to go down to Vancouver and get some more detailed tests done. On Monday, August 26th we found out that we have placenta increta as well as notching along one side of my uterine arteries. These are two completely seperate conditions and both dangerous in their own way. Placenta increta was a bit of a shock, I was prepared for accreta, but not expecting to already be hearing such bad news. Placenta accreta is a condition in which the placenta adheres to the uterine lining. In a normal pregnancy, the placenta and uterus are like velcro. They are separate, but stuck together. With accreta, you can imagine that the velcro gets overheated and glues together. The natural barrier between the placenta and uterus is nonexistent. This is what they think I had with the last two pregnancies. This time, I am diagnosed with increta. This is where the placenta grows INto the uterine wall. It can grow in just a small area or large. It can grow deeply or not. It varies greatly in severity and although it can get worse as my pregnancy progresses, it cannot reverse or get better. In my case, a very large portion of my placenta has grown into the wall and they are concerned that it will continue to grow. At this point my placenta is is high and at the back of my uterus. If it continues to grow, it will grow through my wall and begin attaching to my intestines. You can imagine that this would put the "danger level" of my pregnancy much higher. As it stands now, it is more than likely that the only way to save my life will be to remove my uterus as soon as the baby is out. The risk is still there that I could bleed out or haemorrhage while they try to get my uterus out and so they would be using as many interventions as possible in order to minimize the bleeding and keep me stable. Including putting balloons through my arteries in my legs towards my uterus to inflate and cut off the blood while they preform the surgery. It SUCKS.

I am sitting in this appointment by myself, getting texts from Jonathan wondering what is happening (it was an hour of talking and me just trying to grab as much info as I could at the time). My head was REELING. "So, what your saying is... right now it is bad. There is a 5% chance I could die even if it doesn't get worse. You think it is going to get worse. I can't have any more kids. This is my last pregnancy. Oh, and wait... I have ANOTHER condition??!?!?!?!??!?!"

On top of all of this, I have uterine notching. There are two main arteries that supply blood to the uterus. One on either side. When you are pregnant the muscle wall that is around our arteries to constrict them when we are in shock or stressed dissolves. This is to protect the baby and ensure it ALWAYS receives what it needs, no matter what. On one of my arteries there is restricted blood flow, meaning the muscle has not completely dissolved. I have heard of one side being completely restricted and the baby still surviving through the other artery, but it is dangerous for me and the baby and needs to be closely monitored as my pregnancy progresses. The two main things they will watch for is that baby is growing, as it can cause IUGR (intrauterine growth restriction), as well as signs of preeclampsia (high blood pressure in pregnancy) as it is very closely linked to causing this condition. The fact that I have had preeclampsia in the past combined with this notching puts me at high risk of this condition. Which also puts the risk for the surgery and whole procedure, pregnancy in general, that much higher.

There is still TONS of information we need. I will be going back down to Vancouver in three weeks time to have another ultrasound to check in on the notching. I am not sure as it was one of the million questions I thought of AFTER my appointment, but I think it can get better and/or not get worse. In which case it might not cause anything, just be something to watch. But at this point, they want to see it again and see what is happening with it. In another month after that I will go back for an MRI, consults with all the doctors who will be doing my surgery, including the surgery to implant the balloons, the people that will be putting in my spinal and epidural, and the people that will be putting in my central line to take blood/monitor my blood pressure. We have a lot of decisions to make, a lot more tests to do, and a lot of waiting and praying in the meantime. I will definitely be delivering by C-section and most likely quite early in order to ensure I don't go into labor and the condition doesn't get worse.

And so it is that the girl who is afraid of going to the dentist is going to be sliced and diced every which way, have balloons and tubes inserted into her arteries, IV's, epidural and a spinal. Lets just say that I am dreading going through all of this and trying to process a lot right now. Including the risk to my life and what that means (preparing my will, slowing down my life, etc), the fact that this is my last pregnancy (heart wrenching), the risk to this little one and concern for her safety, and the sheer dread of going through all of this. Lets just say I would be thrilled to "bring on the pain" of a natural birth compared to all of this :(

I don't fully understand it. I am an anomoly in the medical community. "You can't get pre-ecmlampsia unless its your first baby or you've had it before..." um, I got it in my third after two healthy babies. "You don't get accreta unless it attaches to the front, your placenta is in the back so you're good" Third times a charm? But at the same time there is a peace that comes from knowing that after this, I don't have to worry or stress or be afraid of all this stuff again. Each pregnancy is so stressful wondering what will happen and worrying about the complications. Hopefully the interventions will be successful and everything doesn't worsen so I can be home for Christmas. That's my goal. Be alive, with a safe and healthy baby, and home for Christmas. And we will be praying every day to that end.

If you want to stay up to date on this condition and our journey through this pregnancy, please feel free to follow our blog. I will try to do an update each week through our appointments and tests.